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Old 29th October 2009, 03:04 AM
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Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: In a tiny place in this BIG world
Posts: 1,842
Letter to the Passport Office

This letter is a thing of beauty (even if the language is a bit
> rough)...You definitely feel the guy's pain!
> An actual letter to the passport office...
>
>
> Dear sirs,
>
> I'm in the process of renewing my passport, and still cannot
> believe this.
> How is it that Radio Shack has my address and telephone number
> and knows
> that I bought a cable tv. from them back in 1987, and yet, the
> Federal
> Government is still asking me where I was born and on what
> date.
>
> For Christ sakes, do you guys do this by hand? My birth date you
> have on my
> social security card, and it is on all the income tax forms I've
> filed for
> the past 30 years. It is on my health insurance card, my
> driver's license,
> on the last eight damn passports I've had, on all those stupid
> customs
> declaration forms I've had to fill out before being allowed off
> the plane
> over the last 30 years, and all those insufferable census forms
> that are
> done at election times.
>
> Would somebody please take note, once and for all, that my
> mother's name is
> Maryanne, my father's name is Robert and I'd be absolutely
> astounded if that
> ever changed between now and when I die!!!!!!
>
> I apologize, I'm really ****ed off this morning. Between you
> an'me, I've
> had enough of this bull****! You send the application to my
> house, then you
> ask me for my ****in' address.
>
> What is going on? You have a gang of Neanderthal *******s
> workin' there!
> Look at my damn picture. Do I look like Bin Laden? I don't want
> to dig up
> Yasser Arafat, for **** sakes. I just want to go and park my ass
> on a sandy
> beach.
And would someone please tell me, why would you give a ****
> whether I plan
> on visiting a farm in the next 15 days? If I ever got the urge
> to do
> something weird to a chicken or a goat, believe you me, I'd sure
> as hell not
> want to tell anyone!
>
> Well, I have to go now, 'cause I have to go to the other end of
> the city and
> get another ****in' copy of my birth certificate, to the tune of
> $60. Would
> it be so complicated to have all the services in the same spot
> to assist in
> the issuance of a new passport the same day?? Nooooo, that'd be
> too damn
> easy and maybe even make sense. You'd rather have us running
> all over the
> ****in' place like chickens with our heads cut off, then find
> some *******
> to confirm that it's really me on the damn picture - you know,
> the one where
> we're not allowed to smile?! (bureaucratic ****in' morons) Hey,
> you know
> why we can't smile? We're totally ****ed off!
>
>
> Signed
> - An Irate Citizen.
>
>
> P.S. Remember what I said above about the picture and getting
> someone to
> confirm that it's me? Well, my family has been in this country
> since 1776
> .........I have served in the military for something over 30
> years and have
> had security clearances up the yingyang........However, I have
> to get
> someone 'important' to verify who I am - you know, someone like
> my doctor WHO
> WAS BORN AND RAISED IN INDIA !
>
> Sincerely,
>
> You Sure In The Hell Should Know Who
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  #2 (permalink)  
Old 29th October 2009, 03:08 AM
ViP Member
 
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: In a tiny place in this BIG world
Posts: 1,842
Iraq TV Guide


SUNDAY:
0800 - My 33 Sons
0830 - Osama Knows Best
0900 - I Dream of Mohammed
0930 - Let's Mecca Deal
1000 - The Kabul Hillbillies

MONDAY:
0800 - Husseinfeld
0900 - Mad About Everything
0930 - Monday Night Stoning
1000 - Win Bin Laden's Money
1030 - Allah McBeal

TUESDAY:
0800 - Wheel of Terror
0830 - The Price is Right if Osama Says it's Right
0900 - Children are Forbidden from Saying the Darndest Things
0930 - Taliban's Wackiest Public Execution Bloopers
1000 - Buffy the Yankee Imperialist Dog Slayer

WEDNESDAY:
0800 - Beat the Press
0830 - When Kurds Attack
0900 - Two Guys, a Girl, and Pita Bread
0930 - Just Shoot Everyone
1000 - Veilwatch

THURSDAY:
0800 - Fatima Loves Chachi
0830 - M*U*S*T*A*S*H
0900 - Veronica's Closet Full of Long, Black, Shapeless Dresses and Veils
0930 - Married with 139 Children
1000 - Eye for an Eye Witness News

FRIDAY:
0800 - Judge Saddam
0830 - Suddenly Sanctions
0900 - Who Wants to Marry a Terrorist Millionaire?
0930 - Cave and Garden Television
1000 - No-Witness News

SATURDAY:
0800 - Spongebob Squareturban
0830 - Who's Koran Is It Anyway?
0900 - Teletalibans
0930 - Camel 54, Where Are You?
1000 - Survival - Baghdad
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